


Capture It

by pastelblue



Category: K-pop, NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anxiety, Art School, Artist Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Artist Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, M/M, Photography, Soft Kim Jungwoo (NCT), Soft Seo Johnny, Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas is Whipped
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-07-16 05:36:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16079516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastelblue/pseuds/pastelblue
Summary: johnny is careless and always warm.jungwoo is caring and freezes easily.next to the movie titanic and their love for photography, a strong, affectionate friendship connects them.but they didn't know it would end that way, once johnny told jungwoo to photograph him like one of those french girls.





	1. 'let me at least hold your hand'

university was hard. between getting up after not sleeping enough and going to bed way too late were only lectures, some semi-enjoyable time with friends and homework. a cycle only holidays could stop. 

the alarm started at point 6.30am, shaking johnny out of his dreams. rubbing his eyes, he sat up and contemplanted if it would be worth it to miss out on showering to squeeze in twenty more minutes of precious sleep. 

but since he desperatly needed it after working out yesterday and being too lazy to shower, he just swung the comforter back and trotted into the small bathroom. 

four rooms further, jungwoo was already done with his morning routine, and now busy cleaning his camera he got last christmas, before heading out and meeting in a small café with his friend, spending the small amount of time until lectures started. 

putting the lenses back into the protector case, he looked at the clock over his desk. it was already 6.55am and he agreed on meeting at 7.15am. the café being in a fifteen minute walking distance, he had to leave now to be still there on time. jungwoo usually liked being early, it gave him time to settle down and get used to his surroundings, even if he already knew them. 

three minutes later, johnny looked at his phone.  
"already 7.02am, how did the time pass so fast?"  
tying his shoes and throwing his bag over his shoulder, he left the dorm room.  
at first he walked normally, thinking there would be enough time. but after a few minutes, he began to worry that jungwoo would be mad at him if he got to the café too late, so he ran the last third of the way. 

jungwoo was sitting at his usual table in the café, already holding a cup of steaming tea in both of his cold hands to warm them up. suddenly, the door shot open and a slighty sweaty and heavy breathing johnny came towards the table with long steps. 

"god, jungwoo, i'm so sorry, i know i'm late again, but i finished a project and the shower and-", Johnny began, but jungwoo stopped him.  
"it's okay, you're only two minutes late. are you okay? you should have brought a jacket, you're sweating now and its already cold outside now that its almost october."  
jungwoo was worried, though it wasn't a big thing. he wouldn't be able to stand even a few days of boring lectures without johnny next to him, so keeping him healthy was essential. also, watching his friend being sick was torture for the caring boy. 

"no, it's okay, i'll be fine, university is just a few minutes away and there, look, the sun is coming out, it'll warm up soon.", johnny tried to calm jungwoos worries.  
"but it's-"  
"jungwoo. it's okay, trust me"  
"if you say so..."

he still wasn't convinced, but he didn't plan on starting an argument with johnny this early, what, yes, had happened months back as johnny refused to wear a scarf as the temperatures dropped the first time that year. johnny always blamed it on jungwoos easily-freezing body.

"you already ordered?"  
"no, i only got some tea, my hands were cold and i have choir this morning, so i wanted to help my throat and my hands."  
"mind if i order for us? the usual?"  
"sure, but no coffee for me this morning, last time i was shaking even more as usual before singing."  
"you have no reason to be so nervous, you're voice is beautiful."  
"but it could be better..."

before the older boy could oppose, the door opened and he saw another friend, doyoung, coming through. 

"morning", the boy said, voice still deep and raspy from sleep. 

"morning. man, you look dead. should i order some coffee for you?"  
"god bless you, johnny. i need at least two extra shots of espresso, otherwise i'm gonna enter a coma during the first lecture.", doyoung said, yawning into the sentence. 

"sit next to me doyoung, johnny will order for us.", jungwoo suggested his friend, since said looked like he would collapse any second. slacking down onto the chair, doyoung placed his head in the crook of his elbow right away. 

"why are you so tired?", jungwoo opened the conversation again.  
"had a project due. it's the first one this semester, i wanted it to be perfect, so last night i threw everything over and started again."  
the youngest could tell he was desperatly trying to stay awake.  
"i'm sure it was great the way it was before. you shouldn't start the year like that, it's only gonna become harder, save your energy for the exams.", jungwoos caring side was coming through again. 

"no, it was bad, the paint was applied too thick and the whole thing was out of proportions."  
other than his friends, doyoung was majoring in fine arts. 

at that moment, johnny came around the corner with two croissants and two cups of coffee, one with two extra shots of espresso. 

he handed one to doyoung, which weakly grabbed the cup with both hands and immediatly began drinking. 

johnny sat opposite of jungwoo after placing the plate with the croissant in front of him. the plates were one reason why jungwoo liked that café so much. they weren't just plain white, no, they were gold rimmed and had beautiful flower prints on them that looked liked an aquarell painting.  
the youngest began to mindlessly pick his croissant apart. it was still warm and buttery. jungwoo loved it. 

johnny had begun to nip at his cup of coffee after dumping an unhealthy amount of sugar in there. he looked over the table at doyoung which had his eyes closed, still holding the cup againt his lips and occasionally taking little sips. 

"jungwoo?", the oldest boy began.  
"yes, hyung?"  
"after our first lecture is a free period, you wanna hang out together?"  
"depends on what you wanna do or where you wanna go, it's cold and i don't wanna catch a cold again."  
not only did jungwoo freeze easily, he also was an easy target for various illnesses and infections. the poor boys health was just as fragile as his body looked at the first glance. 

"i thought of my dorm room, there's a dicaprio movie playing on tv this morning, it's the replay of yesterday night."  
"titanic? we haven't watched that in ages."  
"you literally watched it 3 weeks ago.", a still not fully awake doyoung said, opening one eye droopily.  
"it's a masterpiece, you just can't watch it enough.", the youngest tried to convince his friend. "johnny, i'm right, huh?"

"i mean, we do watch it alot-", he started. doyoung was already nodding at the unfinished sentence. "but it's the best movie ever filmed, so it should be watched religiously!"  
johnny giggled at his friend's disappointed face.  
"it's 'catch me if you can', not titanic though. but it's still a good one.", he spoke to jungwoo again. 

"your room is always messy.", he shook his head, complaining.  
"that's not true, i tidy it up every weekend, my room looks great, yours is just overly neat, so-"  
he couldn't finish, the sleepy coffeehead interrupted.  
"i really don't wanna stop your discussion, but the clock says 7.25am, so i'm gonna listen and make my way to university, since i don't wanna be late to my lecture." he got up, buttoned his coat all the way up and left with his bag hanging over his right shoulder. 

jungwoo and johnny nodded in agreement. the semester was still young, it would be stupid to already miss or be late to lectures. 

"i already paid for all of us, let's go.", the oldest boy hurried, grabbing his remaining croissant and stuffing it in his cheeks. jungwoo thought that he looked like a little hamster.  
"you didn't have to pay for me, and what about the jacket you don't have? you will get sick.", the youngest was mad, even though him being mad did not look or sound either aggressive nor angry. he just raised his normally calm and soft voice a bit and furrowed his dark eyebrows. 

"i won't be cold, i have my sweater.", johnny became impatient.  
"let me at least hold your hands in my pockets, my hands are warm now, i held the tea cup the whole time."  
the jungwoo was eager to help his friend in any way. he would even offer him his jacket, but he knew that johnny, with his broad shoulders, wouldn't fit into it, let alone even accept it in the first place. 

"sure, i'd love that. have you finished your food?"  
"no, wait."  
imitating johnny, he stuffed the pastry into his mouth while already slipping into the sleeves of his parker.  
"we can go.", he muffled in between chewing. 

as soon as they stepped out if the café, jungwoo grabbed johnny's hands.  
one went into his thickly lined pocket, the other one rested in his uncommonly warm hands.  
like that they made their way to university, walking close together, warming one another, johnny jungwoo more than the other way round.


	2. 'you don't have to'

it was the free period after their theoretical photography lecture.  
johnny and jungwoo walked back together to their dorm, hands in jungwoos pockets again.  
the younger one's hands were cold again, the aftermath of the hot tea had faded half an hour ago. 

they walked in silence. both had these phases in which they just didn't need to say anything, maybe they couldn't. either in thought or pure mind blankness, they kept the words inside their mouths, swallowing them back down if they came up too early.  
neither of the boys wanted to disturb the precious silence that the fall morning. 

not until jungwoo saw a beautiful view - the old maple tree on the campus was shedding his leaves, colored like the rising morning sun. jungwoo ran inside the storm of thousand small suns, after quickly passing his camera to johnny. he morphed in perfectly with his orange head of hair.  
the younger stood under the tree smiling like a little child that just saw snow for the first time in it's life. 

"hyung, now!"

"huh?"

"capture it!"

johnny gladly followed his friends request right away. his arms were extended, his palms faced towards the blue-grey sky, trying to catch some of the falling leaves floating around him. the boy was beaming with happiness, eyes shining and smile bright.  
and that's how johnny captured him. 

the magic of the moment didn't fade until they reached johnnys dorm room.he was lucky, he had a room on his own while jungwoo had to share with yukhei, a student from hongkong that didn't arrive for this semester yet. 

jungwoo was freezing again, the cold wind creating the mesmerizing whirl of maple leaves a few minutes ago also left him shivering. johnny noticed during their hand holding on the way, making it his first move to wrap the younger as soon as they took off their shoes. 

jungwoo was sitting up againt the headboard of johnny's bed, wrapped in a fluffy cocoon and feeling content and warm again. he was less focused on the movie playing in front of him, unlike johnny, that was completely immersed in the story line. everytime the older giggled, jungwoo felt his heart become lighter with joy. 

"jungwoo, look, did you see that?", johnny referred to the acting dicaprio on the screen.  
"yes hyung. but i don't understand this movie, what is he doing all the time?"  
wrapping an arm about the younger, johnny began to explain.  
"dicaprio is a young bankrobber in this movie. he fakes checks. some day he begins to pretend to work in different jobs, and then uses those paychecks to fake even more. and he works as a doctor and, right now, he's a pilot. and then there's that fbi agent-"

the older ended up rambling until the movie was over, about how well made the movie is, how it's really impressive that it's based of a real story and in the end, as always, talks about dicaprio's talent as an actor. 

he held jungwoo in his arm the whole time. 

"jungwoo? jungwoo, come on. we have to be back for the lecture in eight minutes."  
johnny lightly shook his friend awake, already unwrapping him from the blanket. 

"hyung, wait. i'm ready. we can go now."  
the younger started kicking the remaining blanket that johnny has tried to free him from, which only resulted in a still sleepy jungwoo falling out of bed. 

"here are your shoes.", johnny said with an urgent undertone in his voice.  
"thanks, hyung." he swiftly slipped them on, got up and put his thick parker on. 

on the way out of the dorm, the older asked something that caught jungwoo of guard. 

"do you wanna hold my hand again?"

saying he was shocked would be overexaggerated, but he was... surprised.  
johnny only held his hand when it was necessary, when jungwoo was so cold that his knuckles began to turn a violett-blue shade or when he was nervous again, not rarely anxiety kicking in, and he was shaking. 

"i'm not cold, hyung. you don't have to."  
"but i want to."

jungwoo didn't know what to do. being rude and declining wasn't an option but it felt odd as well to say yes. holding hands with johnny was comforting. physical contact wasn't something uncommon for them. cuddling during a movie was a frequent event for them, especially if titanic was playing again and jungwoo's tears just kept rolling down his cheeks. 

"if you want to, hyung. here-", the younger extended his hand towards johnny.  
"only if you want it too, jungwoo."

he hesitated two seconds. two seconds that stretched like minutes for johnny.  
"i do, hyung. and now take my hand, we'll be late otherwise."  
the walk there was quite again, neither of them saying a word. they both focused on the feeling of eachothers hand. 

the next period was practical photography. jungwoo liked it so much more than theory. it was diffrent seeing pictures and having professeurs about the way it was taken, the intentions, the angle or which lense you should use and feeling the weight of your own camera in your hands, searching for a motive that catches your attention, finally finding it and then pressing the release button to make your vision of the picture happen. 

johnny kept glancing at jungwoo during the period. the latter noticed but didn't do anything about it. all in all, it was quiet, the professeur, mrs. han, was young and nice. the work she gave wasn't to hard, was always enjoyable and challenging everybody's creativity. the partner project given by the her today was to create a photograph collage with the theme "the simplicity of us".

"since i'm sure you guys are old enough to choose your own partners, i'll just stay out of it. the project is due in a week. i hope you can have some fun with it.", with that she closed the lesson. 

jungwoo and johnny swung the bags over their shoulders and headed out. towards them came ten, a small guy from their year that, like doyoung, belonged to their close circle of friends. 

"johnny, wanna be partners for the project?", ten asked cheerful.  
"i'm already working together with jungwoo, thanks for thinking of me tho.", the older replied politely, but with an undertone in his voice that jungwoo, neither ten could make out what it was supposed to mean. 

the second time that day, jungwoo was surprised. they hadn't talked about who two work with yet, still johnny chose him as if it was obvious they had to do this together. jungwoo felt flustered at how his friend immediatly thought of him. 

during lunch, doyoung was already waiting for them in their usual place - an old, comfortable couch in a staff room that hasn't been used in ages.  
doyoung discovered it on his second day at university while looking for the restroom.  
nobody seemed to be even looking inside, so the three declared it their own. one reason was the fact that doyoung didn't like sitting in the cafeteria during lunch. he always reasoned it with "the people are obnoxious and loud, it's annoying".  
maybe that was the reason jungwoo was so adored by him - he always talked in his soft and calm voice. not that he talked quietly, rather was his speech lika a soothing melody for the ear. 

"as you know, i'm in that graphic design lecture. today, there was this random guy, coming five minutes too late. mr. jung almost died a heart attack because the doors were slammed open that hard.", doyoung started rambling out of the blue. when he was really annoyed, his monologue could go on for hours, highlights always were his occasional angry claps. he already took another breath to continue.  
"anyways, that guy is a tower, he is almost taller than johnny and loud. he is so loud. and he had the audacity to sit next to me. and you know what his excuse was?"

"it must be something ridiculous if he puts it like that.", jungwoo whispered to johnny. the latter just nodded his head in agreement.  
"he said, and now listen well, he actually wanted to make us believe, that he had problems with the flight from hongkong last night and that his roommate hadn't been there so he had to ask a dwarf for help to get into his room."  
doyoung had his eyebrows furrowed and gestured wildly, looking like he wanted to kill an entire swarm of mosquitos with his bare hands. 

"jungwoo?", johnny nudged his friend lightly.  
"yes, hyung?", the younger returned.  
"didn't you say your roommate is from hongkong?"  
"do you think that-", jungwoo's eyes got big and he inhaled sharply.  
"that your roommate is a loud guy without manners?", johnny nodded.  
the youngers body slumped back into the couch. 

"oh no..."


	3. 'man, i hate those'

it was not like jungwoo thought he was gonna hate his new roommate, he got along with almost everyone that showed him the same respect and kindness he treated them with. doyoung had a habit of overexarregating when he was annoyed. which, to be honest, happened on an almost daily basis. once, he told jungwoo that ten had flirted with johnny 'disgustingly obvious' and that he nearly sat on the older lap. a quick 'i almost spit out my guts, let me tell you that' was also added.  
in reality, the thai had situated himself about a meter away from johnny and was asking him about a new movie the latter had watched in the theatres the day before.  
jungwoo knew to take everything his friend told him with not only one, but multiple grains of salt. 

johnny and jungwoo had finished their lectures for the day and were walking back to the dorms, this time their hands were seperated. the sun had come out and jungwoo was not longer feeling like an ice cube. the two had parted ways as they stood in front of johnny's room the second time that day. after a brief hug, jungwoo had trotted to his own room, which he now stood in front of.  
hesistantly, he took out his keys and unlocked the door. he opened it-

 

and the room was empty. no new roommate to be seen. so yukhei, who was noted as jungwoos roommate on the plan in the hallway, had still to arrive. 

the red head felt relieved. a few more days alone. it was probably better that way. people already thought he was weird, just because he sometimes showed a childish side. he didn't need somebody telling these people details about him. that had already happened in high school, just because the boy told his 'friend' back then, that he had knitted a scarf for his cousin, which seemed to be unacceptable for a male since it was considered 'a girl thing'.  
"stupid gender roles and standards in this society", he mumbled a little louder than wanted to himself and sighed. 

"man, i hate those."

jungwoo let his keys fall and screamed, which developed into a muffled shriek behind his sweater sleeve.

"wait, i'm sorry. i'm yukhei, i arrived a few hours ago and my stuff is still in another room, and-"  
in the bathroom door stood a guy, a little taller than jungwoo himself, extending his hand for jungwoo to shake.  
he accepted and uttered, "um, i'm jungwoo. nice to meet you"  
"nice to meet you too. i'm really sorry for scaring you, that was a dumb way to approach you.", he spoke, his voice deep and slightly raspy. "i thought expressing my hatred for this society was a good ice breaker, but a hi at first would've probably been better."  
"it's okay. i just thought you didn't arrive yet, nobody told me when i could expect you. where's your luggage?"  
"man, that's a funny story-", yukhei slapped his hands together once.  
"so, i arrived here while everyone else was already in lecture. i had problems with my flight and i didn't know my room nor where to get keys. so i saw this little guy in the hallway, and he was saying something to himself in thai. and i thought 'hey, i speak thai too' so i asked him where i could get a key or if i could put my luggage somewhere so i could visit the lecture. then he-"  
"so you spoke with ten?", jungwoo interrupted him.  
"yeah, ten. you know him? my luggage is in his room as well. i just wanted to get it."  
"i could help you, i'm friends with ten as well.", jungwoo offered.  
"man, that would be great. do you have time right now?"  
"yeah sure."  
"okay man, let's go", yukhei said enthusiastically. 

jungwoo already liked his new roommate. he radiated happiness. it was something johnny did too and jungwoo admired that. 

they were on their way to ten's room as yukhei suddenly spoke.  
"jungwoo? do you have a boyfriend?"

said boy was, to say the least, modestly shocked. did yukhei already have an interest in him? maybe he wanted to take him on a date. but they only knew eachother for five minutes. would his roommate hit on him if he said he was single? that would make rooming together a nightmare. should he lie? no, he hated that idea. 

he finally decided truth would be the best option.  
"n-no, i don't have a boyfriend. but why do you ask?"  
"ten told me earlier to be careful, because your boyfriend could get jealous now that i'm sharing a room with you.", yukhei replied confused.  
"i don't understand why he'd say that. i will ask him, where almost there anyways."  
that was unusual for ten, he was not a person that spread rumors or joked around about relationships. jungwoo knew the boy took those really serious.

as they reached ten's door, yukhei didn't hesitate to knock multiple times and call out something in thai. just like johnny ten had a room by himself, so there was no problem with accidently disturbing a possible roommate. 

the door was opened almost immediatly, revealing a tired looking ten, his black hair messy and eyes droopy. 

"sorry, i just took a nap, my sleeping schedule is shit and i had dance practice this morning. come in."  
he welcomed them with a raspy voice.  
"thanks man, i'm just gonna get my stuff and then disappear again. jungwoo came to help me."  
said jungwoo still didn't know how to really find out why ten displayed him and johnny as a couple.  
yukhei already went to the back of the room, picking up a dark blue suitcase. 

jungwoo had irrational feeling of embarassment about asking ten why he told yukhei that jungwoo was johnny's boyfriend. the boy took as much of his courage as he could in the matter of two seconds and approached ten, which had sat down on the second bed that looked undone, since he probably slept in there because the first bed was occupied by parts of yukhei's luggage. 

"ehm, ten?", jungwoo finally began.  
"yes, juwoos?"  
ten called him by his nickname, which was created during a sleepover with him, johnny and doyoung.  
"yukhei told me something. he said that you spoke about me and johnny. something like that he's my-, my boyfriend.", jungwoo had the urge to hide his face in his sweater sleeves. never having had a relationship, jungwoo felt shy talking about it.  
"i did. is there a problem with having told him?", ten seemed unbothered.  
"in general no, but we are not even together. how did you even get the idea?"  
describing jungwoo as confused in that moment was an understatement.  
"you aren't? i thought, wait, i thought you were. the two of you are always together, and the way johnny-, no, nevermind. i interpreted stuff wrong then. i apologise for that."  
"it's alright, it was only yukhei. just please don't say that to somebody else."  
"i won't, i promise. again, i'm sorry."  
jungwoo was relieved he had cleared the situation before rumors could pop up. 

"jungwoo, i'm ready. could you please take those two bags? they're not heavy."  
yukhei cut through the awkward silence in the room that had occured after ten had stopped talking.  
"yes yukhei."  
he walked over to the bed and took the bags, yukhei already at the door, talking to ten.  
"thanks for being able to leave my stuff here, man."  
"no problem. i'm meeting with jungwoo and some friends before lecture tomorrow, you wanna tag along? jungwoo, can he?"  
"of course."  
"then see you tomorrow, yukhei. you too, jungwoo."  
ten held the door open for the boys, sending one last smile. 

back at their room, jungwoo helped yukhei, which he found out was younger than him through a birthday conversation they had, unpack his stuff. throughout placing clothes in the wardrobe and putting sheets on the bed, yukhei kept rambling about his home in hongkong. rather than annoying, jungwoo found it to be entertaining and was certain that with his new roommate, there would barely be any boredom. 

the sun had long set as they were done. both were tired, wanting to sleep after a long day and an even longer one to come.  
they washed up and got into bed, still checking messages on their phone or chatting with friends. 

the last thing jungwoo had in mind as he fell asleep that night was yukhei's 'good night' and the message johnny had sent him. 

[hey juwoos, i had fun today watching the movie with you. tomorrow, 'me before you' will be shown on tv. maybe we can watch it together. sleep well.  
-your one and only johnny]  
seen 11:24 pm


	4. 'it's how i used to look at him'

morning occured way too fast, the alarm was slammed down and curse words came from yukhei's side of the room.  
jungwoo who had already gotten up at 6am, was now witnessing his roommates awakening while chuckling.  
jungwoo was cleaning his camera again, a daily habit he loved. he liked the way he had to gently treat the lenses. he liked the way the weight of the camera felt in his hands, something there was not always time for to appreciate. 

yukhei had finally rolled out of bed and greeted jungwoo.  
"morning, man.", his voice even deeper than usual.  
"good morning. it's 6:30am right now, i'll always leave at 6:55am because it takes fifteen to walk to the café if you don't want to run."  
"alright, i'll be ready then.", he murmured and began walking to the bathroom, almost stumbling over his shoes next to the bathroom door.  
jungwoo was bored, he had finished his routine faster than usual.  
deciding on checking his messages, he took two big steps from the desk to his bed across the room to get his phone. 

my one and only johnny  
[good morning.]  
seen 6:31 am

over jungwoo's face grew a big smile, like the text yesterday night, messages like that from his friend were unusual. he only send those out if it was jungwoo's birthday. should he write back even though he was gonna meet the older in a few minutes anyways? 

four rooms further, johnny didn't know if he should regret his decision of sending the message. but he didn't have much time to worry, since his phone signaled him that he had a new message. 

juwoos  
[good morning, hyung. i'd really like to watch the movie with you. see you later in the café.]  
seen 6.34 am

suddenly johnny was not tired anymore. he was overwhelmed with anticipation about seeing his friend so soon, as well as spending the evening together to watch the movie. he started rummaging for his pants and a decent shirt, picked them up and nearly jumped into the bathroom to get ready. 

a few moments later, yukhei and jungwoo were on their way to the cafe. jungwoo was cold again, the temperatures had dropped drastically over night. the younger one was unbothered, he seemed to be a walking heater, just like johnny.  
as they arrived, ten and doyoung already sat at their corner seat. doyoung looked like a semi-functioning human being again and ten was just himself - a light smile on his lips, his sketchpad in front of him and a pencil in his hand that he was absentmindly chewing on. he was a major in fine arts, like doyoung. the boy waved, smiling wider as he saw them approaching the table. doyoung did as well. 

"good morning, jungwoo. and what are you doing here, loud giant?"  
ten wheezed and accidently spit out his pencil.  
"that's jungwoo's roommate. how do you know him?"  
"he's the one who interrupted my lecture yesterday because he came too late. and how do you know him?"  
meanwhile jungwoo wanted to say something as well, but he held back, he knew his friends and this would probably turn out to be hilarious. 

"i know him, because i helped him with his stuff yesterday as he arrived.", ten got back at doyoung.  
"that means you're the dwarf he talked about?"  
doyoung started laughing like a maniac, slapping his thighs and the table. jungwoo also couldn't help but giggle and yukhei was laughing along as well.  
as doyoung calmed down, ten's smile was long gone and replaced with a pissed-looking expression.  
it was quiet and jungwoo could finally talk.  
"i actually planned to introduce yukhei properly, so as already mentioned, he's my new roommate."  
"yeah, hi. i don't think it's needed to tell anymore about myself, i know both of you.", yukhei added, he seemed happy to have found people to hang out with and smiled adorably.  
at that moment, johnny entered the café. he took long steps to the table and greeted everyone.  
"good morning."  
everybody echoed a 'morning', except for jungwoo, that turned to johnny and smiling a toothy grin.  
"good morning, hyung."  
johnny looked around his friends and stopped at yukhei, showing a confused expression  
"hey johnny, you don't know yukhei, do you?", ten asked the obvious. 

"no, i don't. but nice to meet you. are you the guy that doyoung talked about, that almost gave mr. jung a heart attack?", facing ten first, then turning  
"yeah, that's me. nice to meet you too, man."  
"does that mean that you're jungwoo's roommate?"  
johnny really wanted him to say no, without knowing why.  
"oh yes, i am! i was lucky to get such a great roommate.", he underlined his statement through throwing an arm around jungwoo's shoulders.  
"you sure were, dude"  
johnny almost sounded mad, an undertone of jealousy lacing his voice.  
would jungwoo now rather watch movies with his roommate? or go on walks around the campus with him?  
sighing, he just sat next to ten. 

jungwoo looked at johnny, on the edge of worrying. he wasn't his usual goofy self today.  
"johnny, i have a funny story to tell you. do you wanna hear it?"  
said boy looked up, his eyes less clouded and an endearing but small smile on his lips.  
"sure, i wanna hear it."  
"yesterday, as ten helped yukhei with his luggage, he told him that the both of us are a couple. can you imagine that?", he responded while slightly giggling.

truth told, for a split second, johnny could imagine it, the picture of him and jungwoo being happy together clear in his mind. 

"but why would you lie about something like that, ten?", johnny asked, turning to his friend.  
"i genuinly thought you guys were a couple.", ten answered without looking up from his sketchpad, finishing a pencil outline of a project due for today's practical arts period. he was a major in fine arts like doyoung, but with a stronger focus on drawing than grapic design. he liked the traditional way of creating more.  
"you thought we were a couple? why though?", johnny was surprised, he expected his friend to declare what bad of a joke it was.  
"you seem like a couple to me, that's all."  
the thai boy responded. 

doyoung could almost cut the weird tension with a knife that hung in the air at that moment, quickly deciding to clear the situation for just a short moment, he stood up. 

"jungwoo, nobody of us ordered yet, i just wanted to do so, can you help me with it?"  
"yes, hyung. i need a tea anyways.", he seemed relieved, having also sensed the obscure atmosphere.  
"i assume you all take the usual. and what about you, loud yukhei"  
"i just want some coffee."  
"will do."  
with that, the two made their way to the counter. 

ten nudged johnny as soon as doyoung and jungwoo were ordering, wanting to make sure they couldn't hear them.  
"johnny?"  
"hmm?", he only hummed.  
"do you like jungwoo?"  
"of course, he's my best friend, dude."  
"that's not what i mean."  
johnny was completly speechless now.  
"no, ten, why would you think that? first the couple thing and now this!"  
"i see the way you look at him. it's how i used to look at him."  
the older boy knew who was meant. but, was he really doing that? no, that couldn't be, he would've know if those feelings had crept their way inside.  
those feelings. he had not felt them for so long.

at that moment, jungwoo came back and handed him his croissant and a cup of coffee. as johnny took them, his hands met jungwoo's cold ones. 

and johnny felt something long lost again.

 

__________________________

 

the day at university was short for johnny today, having only two lectures. he walked back to his dorm, waiting for jungwoo to come back as well. 

he was thinking hard during his time of waiting. did he really feel more than platonic love for his friend? 

he was torn between wishing he did and didn't. 

one part of him was longing for somebody he could give his everything to, the hopeless romantic in him that was desperatly waiting for his soulmate to come.

the other part was afraid of ruining his friendship and getting hurt. 

still deep in thought, he heard a knock on the door.  
"its me, hyung. i came to watch the movie with you."  
johnny got up, opening the door with a heart that was still beating too fast.


	5. 'this is nice'

johnny's hands were on the door handle for what seemed like forever before he actually pressed it down to open for his friend.  
jungwoo looked adorable, his orange hair a little disheveled from the wind. his cheeks were a little rosy, most likely because he was feeling cold again. 

"hi, hyung.", the younger smiled. "are you okay? you look a little pale. please don't tell me, you're sick because you forgot your jacket yesterday."  
"no, i'm fine.", johnny tried to assure him. jungwoo didn't seem to take it, still skeptically looking at his friend while worrying.  
"if you say so."  
"yeah. anyways, come in. it's still a little early for the movie though."  
jungwoo stepped into the room, taking off his jacket and shoes.  
"we can talk or whatever. but, uhm johnny?"  
"yes?"  
jungwoo felt weird to ask such question.  
"can we cuddle maybe?"  
affection like that had always been shared naturally, when they had scooched closer without realizing and an arm was thrown over the others shoulder to make it more comfortable. it was new to ask for it and sparked a touch of embarrasment in the jungwoo's chest. 

johnny on the other hand was caught off guard. he had not expected this, the universe was challenging his nerves there and then after having witnessed his head hurting from thinking too much. 

"i guess-, no, wait. of course, if you want to we can. are you cold again?", his words formed stumbling.  
jungwoo nodded slightly.  
"okay then, i'm gonna get a blanket from the closet.", he uttered and took a few big steps across the room, opening the closet and taking out a thick comforter that was a soft blue color. 

jungwoo had already sat down on the bed and was now searching on youtube for something interesting they could watch while waiting.  
"wait, come here.", johnny grabbed his friend's attention as he sat against the headboard of the bed and gestured him to sit next to him. jungwoo slit against the headboard as well, tugging himself under johnny's arm.  
"hyung, i've found a titanic conspiracy theory video, do you want to watch it right now?", jungwoo asked, already knowing the older couldn't say no to anything related to his favorite movie.  
"yeah, sure, just put it on."  
johnny leaned more against the bed, making himself comfortable and resting his chin on jungwoos head. 

they watched the video in silence, only little scoffs could be heard from johnny, when he was absolutely convinced that the girl who made the conspiracy was right in her assumptions and that the whole ship sank because somebody sabotaged it. in moments like that, jungwoo would smile to himself, thinking the olders reactions were endearing. 

johnny was feeling tingly all over. had it always felt like that to have jungwoo in his arms? or was he just overthinking?  
he decided to push his thoughts to the side for now, happily nuzzling his head in jungwoo's soft orange hair. 

when the younger had knocked on his door three weeks ago with spontaniously dyed hair, johnny fell in love with it immediatly. the older had always loved the fall season and now that his friend looked like a little pumpkin, he adored it with all his heart, having his own cute pumpkin now. 

"hyung?", jungwoo interrupted his lovey-dovey thoughts. "the video is over. when does the movie start?"  
"oh, wait lemme check.", he replied and took a look at his watch. it showed 12.06 am.  
"uh, in about ten minutes. are you alright?"  
"yes hyung, thanks to you i'm not cold anymore. here, feel."  
he extended his hand for johnny to take it. the latter did as his friend asked, holding his hand in his slightly bigger one. jungwoo's hand was warm and soft. it felt like home to johnny in that moment. 

the sense time faded for jungwoo while johnny held his hand. the younger was still tugged under his arm and their interwined hands rested on the olders chest. jungwoo could his heart beating against the thin skin of his wrist. not knowing what the unfimiliar feeling was, he didn't push it away but enjoyed it.  
realizing the long hand holding would probably getting slowly uncomfortable for his friends, he loosened his grip. 

johnny thought he overdid it with his subconcious wish for affection shared with his friend, afraid the latter felt annoyed by it.  
"the film should start any minute.", he tried to break awkward silence that had occured. he leaned over to get the tv remote, turning the tv and searching for the right channel.  
he adjusted his posture again, hoping jungwoo would lay his head in the crook between his chest and arm again. johnny felt a little burst of sadness in his chest.  
"jungwoo?"  
"yes, hyung?"  
"don't you wanna cuddle anymore?"

jungwoo felt relieved, so he didn't make the older uncomfortable.  
"i still want to. can i?", he asked and mentioned for johnny to move his arm a little.  
"i have a better idea, last time you told me how your neck hurt after laying in that position for the whole movie. you can sit in front of me and lean against my chest."

jungwoo was touched that his friend considered that for him, so he slowly got up and settled between the older legs.  
as he hesitated for a second to lean against his friend, jungwoo felt how the older put a hand on his chest to pull him against his chest. 

as johnny had his hand on the younger's chest, he could feel his heartbeat under his ribcage, just how jungwoo must have felt his own a few minutes ago. 

"that's better, right?"  
"hmm, this is nice.", jungwoo answered as he took johnny's hand, that still layed flat against the spot below his collarbone. 

______________________

the movie was good, both boys laughed but in the end, both of them also shed some tears. in those moments, jungwoo held johnny's hand a little tighter than usual. 

since it was friday, they didn't have to care about assigned projects that were due. both of them weren't the type to go to parties, they mostly spend their free time with their friends in a comfortable place where they could just relax. 

"hyung?"  
"hmm, jungwoo?", johnny sounded sleepy.  
"did you already think about our project?  
i did, but there was nothing interesting that came to my mind."  
"what's the topic again?", johnny asked while mindlessly combing through jungwoo's hair with his free hand.  
"it's 'the simplicity of us'. and we have to it in form of a collage."  
"i really like that topic. i'll think about it, alright?"  
the younger just nodded against his friends chest. 

jungwoo returned to his room a few hours later. as he opened the door, yukhei, who had read a book until then, immediatly jumped up to greet his roommate.  
"hey, jungwoo. where have you been the whole day?"  
"hi, yukhei. i just spent some time with johnny."  
"oh, did you have some quality couple time together?", yukhei joked around.  
jungwoo thought about how johnny and him held hands and the way the older held him and lightly blushed at the imagine in his mind.  
yukhei noticed and his eyes went wide.  
"so, you are together? man, you should've told me, but you were obvious anyways."  
"no, we are still not together, i told you we are just friends. and what do you mean, i'm obvious?", jungwoo had no idea what his roommate could mean.  
"your face always lights up like a christmas tree when you see him.", yukhei said that as if it was self-evident.  
jungwoo felt slightly caught. yes, he always smiled brighter than anyone else when he saw his friend, but did that have to mean anything?  
"i don't know if it does, but we are not a couple.", jungwoo uttered a touch more quiet than usual.  
"man, i wish you were. but you have feelings for him, am i right?"  
jungwoo couldn't answer yukhei's question, he didn't even know the answer himself.  
"i guess, i do.", he finally managed to say.  
"i knew it. if something happens between the two of you, i want to the first one to know.", he giggled slightly. "and if you wanna talk, you can trust me."  
"thank you, yukhei."

two hours later, jungwoo lied in bed, holding a book in his hands. he was engulved into the story line as his phone made a little 'ping', telling him to check his messages.

my one and only johnny  
[hi juwoos. thank you for coming over today. good night and sleep well.]  
seen 10:27pm

jungwoo could really get used go those messages. the smile he that had formed on his face after reading the message didn't fade until he fell asleep.


	6. 'i failed again'

it was monday again, the weekend had passed calmly. jungwoo sat with doyoung in choir, slightly shaking, having made the fault of drinking black coffee to wake himself up that morning. he was afraid. the younger knew he could sing, but also that others could too, maybe even better than him. aware of his probably irrational nervousness, he reminded himself of how johnny complimented his singing, the older often described it as 'a soft honey pillow'. jungwoo didn't really know what to think of that, but it sounded nice to him and johnny always had such a sincere look in his chocolate eyes when he spoke the words. 

doyoung noticed jungwoo's behaviour, even though he knew his anxiety used to be worse, he was still worried about his friend. sometimes he would get really mad at how self-concious he was about, nevertheless the older mostly kept it to himself, he knew jungwoo would be sad if he snapped at him.

their teacher, ms. lee, was a great lover of music from past decades, especially the 50's and 60's, and today, she was going to practice 'put your head on my shoulder' by paul anka with them, a song jungwoo loved as well. it was romantic, but not too cheesy and the vocals in the original song were deep and rich. 

part of the reason why his nerves were so brittle at that moment, was ms. lee's decision to give him a solo for the second verse. his voice was a higher pitch, the fear of failing and embarassing himself in front of the whole choir was like a stone, weighing jungwoo's chest down. 

during the warm up, he kept glancing at doyoung, thinking how much better his voice would fit the song. funny thing how his friend was the one who actually pushed jungwoo to accept the solo part, which the younger didn't know if he should be thankful for or not. 

"okay, let's begin. the tenors to the front, please, and the basses behind them.", ms. lee called out, hoping to truly gather everyones attention. 

the boy felt a wave of short relief washing over him, until-

"and jungwoo, please come to the piano next to me for your solo part."  
"ms. lee, wouldn't it be better if i just stay with the others?", he voiced, hoping to save the situation for himself.  
"no, you won't be heard properly, just come here."

doyoung squeezed his shoulder reassuringly, but jungwoo wasn't convinced by the olders attempt to make him feel better. he slowly trotted to the front, subconciously playing with the hem of his sweatshirt. he couldn't mess this up, even if it was just a rehearsal. 

once he stood next to the piano, his body refused to turn around to face everybody, his blank stare was directed at those old piano keys. jungwoo thought about how many students had already abused them by mindlessly smashing them down for fun, then his mind turned in a nicer direction and realized that many times, people had created beautiful melodies with those keys. 

the sudden voice of his teacher caused snap out of his thoughts.  
"i'll begin now, jungwoo, please be ready and don't miss your verse."

he only managed to nod slightly, the first verse started. the boy recognized doyoung's voice out of all of them . it was such a unique voice, rich yet light at the same time. 

johnny came into his mind again, how lovely he found the boy's voice. jungwoo became less nervous thinking about his friend, yet he had shy the thought away again, he had to get his verse right from the very beginning. he prayed to nobody in particular that his voice wouldn't crack or give up completly. 

ms. lee hit the last note of the chorus, jungwoo's sign to start, singing quietly at first but quickly gaining volume. 

doyoung had witnessed the anxiety of his friend for a long time now, but the latter often left him in awe at how well he always did nontheless. the imagination of how well he could be, if he only had the confidence always left doyoung mad at the universe, his friend had way too many demons compared to how fragile his mind could be at times. 

jungwoo was half through his verse now, he was glad he hadn't messed up yet, but he also wasn't satisfied with himself. 

then his voice cracked one line before the second chorus. later, he'd blame it on the lack of warm tea to sooth his throat in the morning. 

if he was nervous before, he surely was full-on panicking now, not being able to finish the verse. ms. lee kept on playing, the rest of the choir repeated the chorus, other people would have simply shrugged it off, but jungwoo couldn't. his hands were cramping around the edges of the piano, not loosining their grip, even as the song came to an end and his teacher played the last chord. 

doyoung saw the situation his friend was in. the memory of the day that caused his anxiety washed over him. knowing the lesson would be over in five minutes anyways, he grabbed both of their bags and jackets, hurrying to his friends side. 

jungwoo felt a gentle touch on the tense muscles of his underarm. he looked up and met eyes with doyoung, looking at him understandingly with a genuine smile on his lips. not breaking eye contact, the older softly loosened jungwoo's grip, taking both hands in his. his friend's hands were cold as always, now palms slightly sweaty. doyoung didn't mind. he dragged jungwoo out of the music room, nodding to ms. lee. 

johnny's lecture had been cancelled last minute, he had plopped himself down with a book to read and earphones in his ears. when he saw his friends, he immediatly sprang up, especially as he saw jungwoo, looking at the ground with an expression johnny would describe as pained. 

"jungwoo, what happened?", but calling out again as he noticed his friend didn't look up.  
"doyoung, what happened, is he alright? is he hurt, did he hurt himself? god, answer me, please."  
he was worried sick, halting his steps right in front of the youngest, gently placing one hand on each side of his face and caressing his cheeks with either of his thumbs. 

jungwoo finally looked up, the first time since doyoung pulled him out of the music room. his eyes met johnny's caring gaze, his eyes warm brown and full of concern and missing knowledge about what caused his friend to be in a state like that. 

a single tear escaped and the older caught it, wiping it away and rubbing little circles onto the delicate skin just below jungwoo's eye. 

"don't cry, my little pumpkin. tell me what happened.", johnny's voice in a low, comforting tone.  
he nodded, trying to tell johnny to stop worrying, but he only managed to choke out a sound that made the oldest break a little inside. jungwoo began sobbing quietly, one reason was what he saw as his failure, the other one being the caring behavior of johnny. another one, that jungwoo wasn't aware of in that very moment, was the guilt for falling for his friend, that crept it's way inside his heart. 

johnny couldn't handle seeing the younger like that, especially in the middle of the damn hallway, so he gave doyoung a sign how they should go into the old staffroom so jungwoo could relax there for a little while. 

meanwhile jungwoo had burried his head in the crook of johnny's neck, lightly wetting the soft skin with the remaining tears rolling down his cheeks.  
johnny was stroking his hair lightly, his big hand covering most of the back of his friends head. 

"my little pumpkin? we'll go to our usual place now, just come with me."  
the oldest hands left jungwoo's head and cheek, those spots feeling cold without the warming touch. loosening the latters grip on his hoodie, johnny took the boy's hands into his own, pulling him along gently. 

the room wasn't far away, since they had already been on the third floor. doyoung wished his friends could go straight back to the dorms, but the decision to let jungwoo stabilize himself and his nerves for a few moments seemed to be a better decision.

doyoung opened the door, always unlocked, and held it open for jungwoo and johnny. they plopped down on the old couch immediatly, the youngest curling himself into his friends side. 

"jungwoo, now please tell me what happened. i'm here for you."

the first sound coming from said boy was muffled from talking into johnny's hoodie, the fabric felt soft against his face. 

johnny looked at doyoung, both looking clueless at what it was supposed to mean. 

then finally a clearer sound.  
"i failed again. it's pathetic."

johnny had never heard him sound that broken.


	7. 'don't do that to yourself'

'i failed again. it's pathetic'

after jungwoo's short wave of communication had died down again, doyoung decided it would be best to enlighten johnny about what happened. 

"do you remember how jungwoo got offered the solo for the song in our choir?", he started slowly.  
the oldest nodded. 

"we were practicing and he stood at the front, next to the piano. ms. lee started playing and we sung along to her, but when it was his turn, his voice cracked on the last but one line of the verse. i think, his anxiety started kicking in again badly at that moment. that's why i left with him."

jungwoo was completly silent, he had silenced his sobs some minutes ago, not keen on embarassing himself more in front if johnny. doyoung was another story, he had known him longer and shown him his weak sides many times, often involuntarily nontheless. not that the youngest didn't trust johnny with those sides of him, but subconciously wanting to seem strong in front of the man he liked, jungwoo tried his best to maintain at least some kind of image of himself. 

having told his friend about his anxiety at the beginning of their friendship, johnny had been aware of it and ready to help the younger at all times. he knew that it needed some sort of connection to tell a friend about personal issues, the oldest was happy jungwoo trusted him. 

"jungwoo? little pumpkin?", johnny lightly nudged the boy's shoulder. 

the latter didn't react, doyoung knew that he listened to them but was too caught up in his own mind. maybe he didn't even want to answer, in which doyoung was right. jungwoo wanted nothing more than to just exist as quietly as possible then and there, being held by johnny. on the other hand, he knew that the latter was worried, meaning he felt the urge to at least tell him he was fine. beginning with slightly nodding against the oldest chest, he worked himself to raise his head and catch his friends gaze. 

"hyung."

doyoung sighed in relief that his friend snapped out of his little bubble. once, he was in there almost two days, not talking or reacting in any way. it was when doyoung and him lived together for a few months. during those two days, jungwoo only held his friend's hand and thought about everything and nothing. 

"hey, are you alright?", johnny asked softly, petting jungwoo's head again. 

"yes, i guess.", he muttered. 

of course, johnny and doyoung weren't convinced by that, the latter tried to encourage his friend to share his thoughts.  
"jungwoo, you know that you can tell us what bothers you."

"everything bothers me. i can't sing properly, i can't handle anything. i'm probably bothering you too."  
while still talking, he sat up but kept his gaze directed at the wall, not wanting to face his friends. 

a loud 'no!' fell from the mouths of doyoung and johnny.  
"jungwoo, you'd never be bothersome to us. you care about us all the time, you help us with every little thing and basically get a whole pharmacy worth of products if one of us only sniffles. one more word of that shit and i will send you a letter everyday with at least fifteen things you're amazing at. and trust me, i will."

this was the time doyoung snapped, never actually wanting to raise his voice even the slightlest at the boy, but he felt like it was necessary this time.  
jungwoo's head shot up at the unexpected outburst. 

"pumpkin, don't always belittle yourself."

the youngest shook his head first, but then made up his mind and nodded. he knew that he shoulf have more confidence and try to help his anxiety, but truth be told, it was so much easier to just ignore it and play pretend. 

"you are right. i'm just so disappointed in myself, i couldn't even end the verse without failing.", jungwoo uttered, while searching for johnny's hand again. the latter gladly accepted, lightly squeezing once and then stroking the back with his thumb. 

"don't do that to yourself. everybody's voice cracks sometimes, and being afraid of it so much makes the chance for it to happen even bigger. nobody is gonna laugh about you. nobody is gonna think you are not capable of singing. remember how doyoung squeaked during the last concert because he had been sick the day before and his throat was still sore? it's no big deal."

throughout his talk, johnny held eye contact with the younger constantly. 

doyoung witnessed the whole thing from the other side of the little room. seeing the way they looked at each other, eyes full of affection, doyoung could understand why ten had been convinced they were in a relationship. 

he cleared his throat.  
"jungwoo, maybe you should go back to the dorms with johnny, more lectures would probably be contraproductive for you right now. i'm gonna excuse you from your last lectures."

"okay, hyung. johnny, would you come with me then?"

"of course. let's go then and get out of here.", johnny answered smiling, then grinning widely as he saw that jungwoo smiled back. 

they stood up and grabbed their bags, making their way out of the staff room. 

_______________________

the second jungwoo opened the door to his room, somebody immediately slammed their arms around him, catching him in a bone-crashing hug. 

"are you alright?", yukhei questioned while still holding the boy. 

"yukhei, yes, i'm fine. b-but how do you-?", jungwoo asked, slightly embarassed but now kind of hugging the boy back. 

"ten heard that somebody felt sick after choir practice, somebody with orange hair and you're the only one with that hair color, so he did simple math and told me a few minutes ago. i thought you might not wanna be alone, if you're sick.", yukhei told and smiled at jungwoo, freeing him from his hold.  
"are you still sick?"

"no, i'm feeling a little better again. thank you for thinking of me."  
jungwoo felt thankful of how somebody he had only known for a few days already cared for him like this. 

johnny cleared his throat, in his opinion, he was slightly third-wheeling.  
"i'll be going now, pumkin. i'm sure you're in good hands."  
he took the youngers hands and squeezed them one last time. 

"okay, hyung. thank you for everything.", smiling, he watched his friend exit the door.

Johnny wouldn't say he was mad at yukhei, but he noticed a jolt of jealousy and disappointment in his chest. wanting to be there for his friend, he had planned of comforting him. the thought of hugging him again, it had sent little sparkles through his body. 

but even when it felt so right, jungwoo only saw him as a friend and he would be a bad one to want more and destroy what they had. 

sitting in his room wad how he spent the rest of his day, once more thinking about jungwoo and contemplanting his feelings. 

later that night, the urge to at least message him became too strong, and johnny just gave in. he still had to make sure the boy was alright. 

four rooms further, yukhei had already fallen asleep, he had worked out earlier that day and exhausting had just taken him. jungwoo wasn't able to let slumber embrace him, his thoughts wilding in his tired mind, yet he still felt so awake. hearing his notification sound, he got and walked across the room to get his phone from his jacket pocket. 

 

my one and only johnny  
[hey, little pumpkin. i hope you are feeling better. if you need anything, just knock on my door, no matter the time.  
goodnight, my juwoos]  
seen 11:02 pm

the boy sighed happily, he had been sad that johnny didn't stay with him longer, holding the olders hand had given him the feeling of coming home and inhaling his scent made his brain all fuzzy.  
continuing with that had been everything jungwoo wanted. 

with johnny's smiling chocolate eyes on his mind, he finally found peace in his sleep that night.


	8. 'i'd love that'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, so the pictures they are taking in this chapter are the 'regular irregular" teaser images. 
> 
> i hope you enjoy the story until now.

going back to university the following day felt a little weird, but at least people thought he had just felt sick. he didn't need rumors to spread about his anxiety. 

the group had met in the café again that day, everyone assuring jungwoo that it was okay and that looking forward would be the best, so that was what he had tried to do. head high, pretending to have more confidence than he actually owned, he walked through the hallway that morning, yet still holding johnny's hand the whole time nontheless. 

their first period got cancelled, it was the same professor in whose lecture johnny was supposed to be yesterday, which got cancelled as well. the older suspected her of being pregnant actually. 

the boys had to get the work on their project started, still not even really talked about it. sitting in the small staff room, they had decided to to so then and there. 

"okay, so 'the simplicity of us', maybe we could some pictures like mugshots, really simple and we can intergrate those well into the collage that we also have to do."

johnny was the first one to throw out an idea, it was a good one and jungwoo immediatly liked it. 

"that's good, hyung, but what other pictures should we use for the collage?"

"we'll see, pumpkin. it has to go with our shots, so it will be probably better to pick them out later according to the color scheme. anyways, should we get started today? after lectures?"

"sure, we might be able to use the studio then, the one on the second floor. it's usually free at that time."

johnny hummed softly in response. jungwoo had been tucked underneath his arm again the whole time, a habit that was slowly forming for both of them. yesterday seemed to have gotten them even closer. 

with a look on his watch, jungwoo sighed tiredly. the first period was almost over, their next lecture nearing with every second. the younger didn't get much sleep last night, even though he was able to let his thoughts go for a little while, after falling asleep he woke up from his slumber every fifteen minutes. 

johnny noticed the boy's exhaustion and tightened his warm hold of him. admiring jungwoo's smile, that he maintained through almost everything, the corners of his own mouth curved up a little bit. 

"we should do something after working on the project today, pumpkin. what do you think of just walking through the park again? the leaves are falling more and more now, and i discovered a tree that has beautiful dark red ones, i'm pretty sure you'll like it.", johnny spoke not quite truthfully. that tree was only a simple tree, same as the other ones, he just missed jungwoo trying to warm his hands with his own. 

"i'd love that, hyung. fall is my favorite season, you know?", jungwoo uttered, a shine in his eyes, something that johnny really missed since yesterday. 

"i know, jungwoo, i know."

"we should get going to theoretical photography now."

as jungwoo stood up, freeing himself from johnny's embrace, the latters side was left feeling cold. reluctantly, he got on his legs as well, still not feeling ready to live through the dry boredom of theory. 

picking up his bag, he extended his hand for the younger to take, who happilly followed his friends silent request. it had become normal for them over the last few weeks, maybe even only days, but the skin contact still send little sparkles from jungwoo's hand over his arm and all the way to his heart. their relationship was growing and deepining rapidly at this point, but they didn't want it to slow down, they weren't afraid of the change, only of the possible consequence that it could cost their friendship. 

the lecture dragged through the morning, everybody at least yawning thrice, including the professor.

at the end, johnny had two naps on his count, with great belief that mr. kang's way of teaching was to blame. jungwoo had woken him up both times, slightly nudging his shoulder and booping his nose, latter simply because the younger found it cute, but wanting to stay in his light slumber, the older put his hand on his friend's knee to signal him to stop. 

lunch break was spent with yukhei and ten in the staff room, jungwoo and johnny sitting with eachother the second time that day on the old couch. yukhei lately spent a major part of his time with the thai boy, their friends assumed it was because they wanted to talk in their mothertongue together, even though yukhei seemed to have more than one. the latter, in reality, began to really like his older, yet so much smaller, newly won friend. he nudged him, nodding to the couch. 

"yukhei, are we really sure they are not dating?", he questioned once again, speaking in thai so that the two lovebirds wouldn't know.

"you know, i'm convinced they like eachother but just push the most obvious feelings away, yet they still do couple stuff, cause they can't surpress the actual emotion.", the younger answered, voice low even though only ten could actually understand him. 

"you could be right, my giant."

in his head, ten told himself how much he know the feeling of liking someone who wasn't aware of it. 

they analyzed their friends' feelings a little more, completly oblivious to the fact that those had the same suspections of the thai duo, considering how close their relationship had gotten during the small amount of time since yukhei had arrived. 

johnny noticed a wave of happiness in his chest, near his heart. ten had been miserabel for quite some time after his last relationship had crumbled down and seeing his smiles increasing every day was a relief. another factor was, like so often these days, jungwoo snuggled up next to him. the oldest knew, that at this rate his feelings grew so constantly and with the speed of light, so confessing any time soon was unevitable, too often had he caught himself glancing at his friends lips. 

the bell interrupted the thoughts of the four young adults, telling them that, this way too short, break was already over. 

__________________________

the studio was indeed free as the boys opened the door and lurked inside. most students majoring in photography hardly ever used it, as it consisted of just white walls and a few wide windows, which flooded the space with light. 

"let's get started, pumpkin. you go first with the mugshot idea we had.", johnny ordered, eager to finish early so they had more time together later. 

"hyung, should i smile?"

"no, keep your expression neutral, it's like a mugshot after all."

johnny worked professional, his passion for the art taking over. he caught jungwoo's face perfectly, photographing so that the background looked blurry, drawing even more attention to the younger's beauty. 

it was johnny's time in front of the lense now. jungwoo didn't have a concept yet, not wanting to repeat the one the older used, he simply improvised. 

a few moments later, he had a picture of his friend standing in front of the white wall, his black outfit creating a strong contrast. jungwoo felt unsatisfied, as if there was something missing. 

"hyung, i have an idea, could you please sit on the ground, in an almost laying position?"

"you mean like rose?"

thinking about the movie reference shortly, he agreed, nodding. it was exactly what he had invisioned.

"then go for it, little pumpkin. photograph me like one of those french girls.", johnny said and giggled. 

after taking a few shots from a little farer away, jungwoo moved directly in front of the older, taking a close-up of his face.  
then he removed the camera from between their faces, not making an attempt to create any more space between them. 

jungwoo's gaze went to johnny's lips. the last week had been hard, him having to remind himself constantly that they were only friends and seeing johnny looking so effortlessly stunning didn't help to calm his beating heart. people only saw him as a shy person, but he had another side which only came out when he stopped thinking and let his passion and insticts take over. those moments occured when he photographed or danced, but never having been in a relationship, he didn't knew it would apply for this as well. 

johnny noticed how the younger had kept his breath in for a long time now. he, as well, was overwhelmed by the closeness of their faces, the distance between their lips so easy to determine. wondering if he should do so, jungwoo didn't give him any time to decide and gently, yet firmly, laid his own lips on johnny's. 

no movements were made the first seconds, then the older started to caress jungwoo's neck, the other hand holding the small of his back, taking the lead of the kiss with that. 

jungwoo's mind was all fuzzy, the only thing clear was the feeling of plump and soft lips pressed onto eachother, moving in perfect sync. his hands found their way into johnny's hair, playing with the silky strands. the older sighed at the new sensation, now pulling the other completly onto his lap. 

they went on until their lungs were missing the oxygen that got lost during the kiss, jungwoo redrawing his lips first, every nerve in them tingling and buzzing. 

johnny didn't let him go like that and placed on final peck on the younger's mouth. 

"wow."


	9. 'you even made the sky cry'

"Wow"

It was the first and only thing that escaped Johnny's mouth. Jungwoo, that still sat in his lap, connected their foreheads and sighed. 

"I've been waiting for this."

The older heard the boy's statement and nodded absentmindly, he wasn't able to grasp its meaning then, still to caught up in the feeling of soft pillow-like lips on his own. 

Jungwoo became worried about what he spoke, Johnny was not answering, his only actions as little as softly caressing the younger's sides, causing the biggest feelings with the simple movement of his fingertips. 

"Hyung?"

"Hmm, pumpkin...", he mumbled contently, voice airy yet raspy. 

"Do you-", Jungwoo stopped mitsentence, this was the question, the fear of rejection inside him was overwhelming, so close to being with the alleged love of bis life, he couldn't lose now. "Do you feel the same?"  
Holding his breath, the boy lifted his head and looked into their other's eyes.

"About what again?"

"I said that i've been waiting for this."

"You wouldn't believe how much i wanted to be this close to you the last few weeks, yet nothing in my imagination came even near to this right here. Would you mind-?"

Jungwoo understood what he meant but didn't give him the chance to fulfill his intentions. 

"You mean something like this?", he softly uttered and let his slightly parted lips roam over Johnny's, before connecting them again. 

In the end, both their lips were red and plush, their hands interwined and their hearts as happy as they could be in that moment. 

"Do you still wanna go to the park together?", Johnny questioned while smiling at the younger as if said had brought down the stars from heaven just for him. 

"Yes, please. I've been looking forward to it since you asked earlier, i thought it would be the highlight of my day, but this with you is everything i could wish for."

"You're always my highlight, trust me. Let's get going then, pumpkin."

Johnny lifted the younger off his lap to get up and offer him his hand, which Jungwoo took to get pulled on his feet. 

"Thank you, hyung."

"You're welcome. Come on, get your jacket on, i bet you're cold again, even if I probably warmed your heart.", the older giggled. 

Jungwoo sighed, he had heard Johnny's cheesy pick-up lines often enough, always meant jokingly, but he had never dreamt of being the person they were directed at. He smiled, he could hop onto the wagon if they were already at it. 

"I'm not warm at all.", Jungwoo started, an undertone of mischief in his voice 

"Huh?", concern filled his voice. 

"My heart is burning, you set it on fire because you're hot."

The younger could a walking tease if he wanted to. Johnny choked on his spit and coughed a few times. Jungwoo laughed, his eyes crinkling up and his shoulder shaking. He loved this, turning the tables like this when he usually was the one that seemed so innocent. Already putting on his jacket, he began the conversation again, the older seemed to have recovered by then. 

"Hyung, are you alright?", his voice drippin with pretended lack of guilt. 

"If you wanna play like, i'm all in, just hope you know what you signed up for.", Johnny was back to his flirty self. 

"Fully aware."

The two boys exchanged knowing gazes and little smirks, both feeling how much fun that would be. 

Johnny reached out for the younger's hand, pressing a kiss on the back of it. 

"Then let the Pucker Games begin, pumpkin."

"The pun was bad, but does that mean I get to kiss you again, hyung?", Jungwoo squeezed the older's hand once, smiling innocently. The latter had to get used to his friend's new-decovered behavior traits. 

"Hmm, you can always try. Anyways, have you seen my jacket?"

"Hyung, you didn't bring one again. How often do I have to tell you, you'll get sick and miss lectures. At least you have a sweatshirt, i guess that also works. Let's see if the fabric is even thick enough.", Jungwoo started nagging and rummaging through Johnny's stuff. The latter chuckled silently, this was the boy he already knew. 

"I found it, it seems pretty warm. Put it on, then we can go.", the younger ordered softly. 

Johnny wordlessly accepted the sweater and pulled it over his head, leaving his hair dissheveled. He tried to tame the mess, brushing his hands through the black strands. 

Walking up to Jungwoo, he grabbed the latter's hand and pulled him out of the door of the small studio with him. 

_______________________

The scene the park offered stunned the two boys even though they had walked through it many times. The dropping temperatures had further colored the leaves which covered the ground like the red sea. 

"Jungwoo?", Johnny was the first one to break the comfortable silence. 

"Yes, hyung?", boy looked up into the chocolate eyes of his elder. 

"What do you even think about... this?", the latter hesitated at the last word. What even was their relationship now? What was the right word to pronounce it? 

"What do you mean? About the park? About the weather? Or do you mean about us?", he said pointing between himself and Johnny. 

"About us."

"I-I'm happy, i guess. I like you and i knew i had to tell you sometime, but I didn't think it would happen like this.", Jungwoo confessed, facing slightly away.   
"What about you?"

"Feeling the same, i think. I was afraid it would ruin our friendship if I told you. Don't you remember what happened to Ten a-"

The older couldn't finish. 

"Of course, I remember. It was a hard time for all of us. I was afraid of that too, to be honest. Being with you always felt right, but it took some time to admit to myself what I was feeling - and still am.", the younger nodded in the end, sort of reassuring himself what he said was genuine. 

"I hope that I don't make things weird now with this, but... I've waited for somebody that would make these emotions bloom inside my heart. And now those flowers have reached my lungs, making it hard for me to breath when I see you. Even right now, when we just hold hands, I can feel the branches growing and longing for the rest of my body."

Johnny tried his best to express his care and affection for his pumpkin, but every single one of the 1.000.000 words in the english language seemed to be meaningless suddenly. 

In all these past years, when his anxiety had been at it's peak and Doyoung was the friend that had stayed with him through thick and thin, one of Jungwoo's few wishes had been finding a boy who didn't care about the 'negative' things about him but just focused on him.   
Jungwoo, the boy who was a hopeless romantic, the boy that had kept his childlike nature until now and the boy that had thought he would never find a love for most of his teenage years. 

Realizing this love was right in front of his heart right now, almost too easy too grasp, made a single tear escape the younger's eye.

"Jungwoo? Hey, please don't cry, little pumpkin. Did I say something wrong?", Johnny stood in front of the boy immediatly, cupping his cheeks and trying to make eyecontact. His thumb wiped away the already dried and a new, still wet, stray tear. 

"It's alright, i'm sorry, it's just that i'm so thankful that I found someone whose feelings are mutual.", he said while choking back more tears. He couldn't cry now, this was a happy day. 

Johnny lovingly smiled at the boy and murmured "I should be thankful for you, actually.", then kissed away the tears. 

In that moment, one of the blood-red leaves landed on Jungwoo's orange mop of hair, along with some raindrops. 

"Pumpkin, you even made the sky cry. We should get going now, neither of us wear waterproof clothes."

The boy smiled at the little remark, already being pulled along by Johnny's hand. 

_____________________

Jungwoo entered his dorm room quietly, he didn't know if Yukhei was in there or not. 

"Jungwoo? Is that you?", a subdued voice called from the bathroom. 

"Yeah, it's me. Who else could it be?"

"I gave Ten a key, we have been hanging out a lot.", Yukhei explained, exiting the bathroom. 

"I noticed that, i'm happy that you have found a good friend already, i really like having you in our group.", Jungwoo stated while smiling even wider. The curve of his lips hadn't died down ever since Johnny had placed a kiss goodbye on his forehead before parting ways. 

"Thanks for accepting me into your group, man. By the way, did something happen? You're glowing."

Jungwoo thought hard if he should tell Yukhei. 

"Me and Johnny spent some time together.", he decided to utter out, it could have meant anything. 

"It's no surprise then, honestly."

"What do you mean?", Jungwoo questioned, eyebrows slightly furrowed. 

Yukhei looked as if the question was completely unnessecary, basically selfexplanatory. 

"Everyone can see how much both of you enjoy eachother's presence, how you always search for eachother's touch. It's seriously the cutest thing.", Yukhei spoke his observation, a certain tone of longing for experiencing something similar in his voice. 

"I never really knew it was like that."


End file.
